Tom’s Rhinoplasty — South Park’s Original Nose Job Clinic
Hi. I’m Tom. I do noses.
For over twenty-five years, Tom’s Rhinoplasty has been the premier — and, let’s be honest, the only — cosmetic surgery destination in South Park, Colorado. We are located on the main street, between the other buildings. You cannot miss us. There is a large sign that says TOM’S RHINOPLASTY on it. People miss us constantly.
Our most celebrated procedure remains the one performed in February 1998, in which a local fourth-grade teacher requested a modest nose adjustment and emerged bearing an unmistakable resemblance to actor David Hasselhoff. We stand by that result.
NEW! We now also do ears. This has been true since 1997.
Procedures & Prices
All prices in 1997 United States dollars. We do not accept insurance, cheques, or questions about our accreditation.
| Procedure | Price | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| The Standard Nose | $2,995 | Our bread and butter. You get a nose. It goes on your face. |
| The Deluxe NoseMost Popular | $4,995 | Same as The Standard Nose, but we say 'deluxe' while we do it. |
| The Hasselhoff | Market Price | Walk in a schoolteacher, walk out a Baywatch icon. Results have precedent. |
| Ear Correction | $1,200 | Because we also do ears. It says so on the sign. Please read the sign. |
| Chin Implant | $1,800 | Ask about our chin. Everybody asks about the chin. |
| Rhinoplasty Reversal | $8,995 | For when the whole new you turns out to be worse than the old you. |
| Free Consultation | FREE* | *Consultation is $250. The word 'free' is decorative. |
Before & After Gallery
What Our Patients Say
“I came in for a small procedure on my nose and left looking like David Hasselhoff. I have no notes. Mr. Hat has several notes.”
A Satisfied Fourth-Grade Teacher
South Park Elementary
“They fixed my nose so good that nobody could hear a word I said afterwards. Honestly no change there.”
Anonymous, In A Parka
Repeat customer. Very repeat.
“Tom personally assured me the procedure was 'basically reversible.' I would like to clarify what 'basically' means. Nobody will return my calls.”
G. Broflovski
Attorney at Law
“Best nose in town and the waiting room has a fish tank. Four stars. The fish looked sick.”
Mrs. Cartman
Local Parent
Frequently Asked Questions
Is Tom's Rhinoplasty a real plastic surgery clinic?
No. Tom's Rhinoplasty is a fictional business from the animated series South Park. This website is an unofficial fan-made parody tribute and does not offer medical services of any kind. If you are looking for actual rhinoplasty, please consult a board-certified surgeon.
What South Park episode is Tom's Rhinoplasty from?
Tom's Rhinoplasty is the title of Season 1, Episode 11, which originally aired on February 11, 1998. Mr. Garrison gets a nose job at the clinic and emerges looking like David Hasselhoff.
Who performs the surgery in the episode?
Doctor Tom, the clinic's namesake, performs Mr. Garrison's nose job.
Who is the substitute teacher in Tom's Rhinoplasty?
Ms. Ellen, voiced by guest star Natasha Henstridge. She substitutes for Mr. Garrison while he recovers, and every boy in the class immediately falls in love with her.
Does Tom's Rhinoplasty do ears?
Yes. We also do ears. It is on the sign. Please stop emailing about the ears.
Sign Our Guestbook
The guestbook is currently closed for maintenance and has been since 1998. Below are the entries we received before it broke.
cool site!!! how do u make the letters move like that
Came for a consultation, stayed for four hours, nobody spoke to me. 10/10 would return.
Your site is not optimized for Netscape Navigator 2.0. Some of us are still on 2.0, Tom.
does tom do ears? the sign says ears but i want to be sure
YES WE DO EARS. IT IS ON THE SIGN. PLEASE STOP EMAILING ME ABOUT THE EARS.